Wednesday, August 8, 2007

What Lessons Have You Learned Since Turning Thirty?

A funny thing happened after I turned 30: I began to feel a rushing sense of what ifs and why nots. What if I'd gotten married later in life? Why not have an actual career, instead of just a job? What do I really want to do with my life? And let's not forget... Why do people keep calling me ma'am? (That seriously makes me want to hit a teeny bopper).

I began to feel like a bit of a rebel. There was no bra-burning or door slamming. Yet, I definitely had feelings of rebellion and resentment. I was at a point where I felt I had not made the most advantageous use of "the best years of my life" - hold the booing, I was still naive about how great being 30 and beyond could be at the time. I questioned the things I'd been taught, the things I'd chosen to believe, and the fact that I'd summarily dismissed my hopes and dreams for the greater good.

I was resentful. I primarily resented myself for letting it happen, yet still lacked the courage to really do anything about it. As any positive thinker knows - which I now am, thank you very much - such negative thoughts are bound to lead to trouble. Bad decisions were made. However, there were lots of really important lessons learned, too.

As I talked to friends, family, etc. I discovered that many women experienced this same sort of period of pain and growth in their 30s. Thus my Adventures of a 30-Something Rebel was born. I wanted to create a space where women could share the reflections, experiences, and wisdom earned during their 30s for two reasons:

  1. Catharsis - Anyone woman over 30 knows the importance of sharing her experience with other women. We're not usually looking for answers, just a listening ear. Someone to tell us that they understand, or that they've had a similar experience. That we're not crazy. That things will work out in the end.
  2. To help other women learn from our mistakes and from the things that we got right, but only wished we'd done sooner.
You'll find some really wonderful women profiled on the site. Many of them are fabulously 40, or Baby Boomer Divas who have graciously shared the lessons that they learned in their 30s and what it has helped them to achieve later in their lives. Hop on over to the site. We'd love to hear your story.




Rain said...

Personally, at 36, I definitely feel that Life has gotten much better in my 30's. The twenties seemed to be all about figuring things out - who am I, what do I want, what do I like, what do I want in a relationship, (and the fact that I do not need to be in one)...where do I want to be in this life.. And yeah, turning the big 3 Zero was traumatic at first, but things have rolled smoothly ever since. Now that you know yourself, it's time to make your move. These days, 30 is young. 30's are primetime. The one thing that does hit you at the mid-point though, if you haven't already, is that making babies is a limited time offer, that we don't have forever to make that happen. That is a definite wake up call.

Stepping Over the Junk said...

VERY cool. I am 34 and feel I am stronger and a better person than in my 20s. I feel I know better who I am. And have a better time sticking up for that.

ZenDenizen said...

I didn't experience any feelings of trauma when I turned 30. And I can honestly say I've had more fun every year since. The best advice I received at my 30th bday party was "make a list of everything you want to do and just do it because you'll find that times goes by much faster now" and he was right.

Samara Leigh said...

That's a fantastic tip, ZenDenizen! In fact, I think I'll share that one on the site. It is so important because you will look up and five years have passed. Now you're approaching 40 and you feel like you haven't accomplished a thing. And you are running out of time.

Not a good feeling. :-0